Somehow, just the act of admitting he was falling apart to someone that he didn't have to put on a good face for was a relief. He'd tried so hard to keep himself together for Cassie and Kon's sake, not wanting to worry them and the only thing he'd really managed to accomplish was demolishing the last of his vodka reserves.

He looked up at Roger and shrugged ruefully. "Just like that. It seems so strange to say so, but it was just how it happened and I've been trying to - to manage ever since. God, I am so tired of thinking and feeling so lost."